सोच और खोज

Well let’s get it started I have a very bad habit …. I lose interest. I become bored. I mean lose interest in everything eventually … except for a few minor things but yes I do lose interest fast and maybe it is my inability to commit to something… …..4 jobs in 2 years though I am sticking to the present one( parental pressure and emotional blackmail)…. Now when the word commit comes forward no one actually goes ahead and tells me that being the bum I am I cant commit to anything ….. People around me tend to think I can’t stick to anything …..Trust me I want to but due to some circumstances and also to excel more and more has refrained me from doing so. I guess that’s the reason why my most of my girlfriends break up with me…….. I mean I know have commitment issues … but the problem is that they are never ready to go on for some time they want an assurance that they will eventually get married …….come on people …. I mean what the hell should I do … I mean I keep telling them lets try this out for some time before jumping to any conclusions or decisions…. My last girlfriend (name withheld) was so hung on the fact that she eventually wanted to get married that even I went along … I didn’t mind I mean told her why not maybe somewhere down the line hell I even pushed it ahead……. but then one night I had a huge panic attack and after witnessing a domestic disturbance I was not so keen on the idea … so I jus called her and said maybe the marriage things is not a great idea and maybe we should be happy right now rather than thinking about the future and all that I mean we have a lot of time on our hands…. First she sends me a mail detailing of what I have done wrong with her she goes ahead and tells me we should break up … I was like fine.. Ok( Now she wants to get back together again !!!) … I don’t get girls well I get some of them but most of them drive me nuts … I know a few friends who got married really early... I mean they were in love and I respect that and all that ….Just that I mean come on go out discover the world there is so much possibility out there I understand that u were college and school sweethearts and all but what the hell think out of the box go meet new people get a broader perspective on things…I mean u can always come back to what you want … but in the process of reaching there u might find something better and this is not only for relationships its for a lot of other things …life is a learning graph which has to be climbed I mean every girl I have dated I have learnt something new ….or she has learnt something new as well …well not only for me but for many others !!! I know this sounds wrong to all the purists but u know how that works..!!! I mean I know its ok to love and be loved but why settle for something less than what you deserve …along the way u will see the breakups and the fights and the usual nakhras and things and they actually go a certain step ahead in preparing you for a much fuller and satisfying relationship …. I mean if u do decide to go ahead with your relation the old one then shouldn’t you know more about each other and trust me in college or in school u never know what it is .. I mean meet for a few hours a day u talk blah blah ….. and the usual go to the coffee place for a drink talk blah blah and then u have a fight about what u should wear and why u not going on the weekend together and all that most of the relations I know sour by the end of college and usually end after both of then have settled down somewhere else but yes not all is lost in these relations u might crib about it but then there are people who have had a very healthy relation due to this ….. I mean also there are pros and cons in everything!!! so yaa there u have it the most weirdest blog I have written cos I really couldn’t see a few of my friends grinding their asses sticking to their gfs from college and school and coming every weekend telling me why I don’t “settle” down and then expect me to stuck to the same girl … I am 24 its time for me to enjoy life … I mean I don’t cheat when I am dating a certain person but then I don’t see the reason that why I should invest time money and my emotions on something which might not even work out in the end !!!! and I don’t believe in dragging something which will eventually end in a very bad way…. I hate it when friends of mine come and crib that everything is not going well …. That relationship is really difficult and blah blah !!! Besides the usual its gonna be ok and all that what I really wanna tell them is listen man “DON’T CRIB “ either figure it out and try to make it work or just move on no amount of cribbing will help you out !!! …. Anyway my final words are people when it comes to relationships and something which I am trying to follow from now onwards is “Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach.”